>Users:   login   |  register       > email     > people    

Two Good Buddies
By Corporal William Young
Published: 11/26/2018

Peopleholdinghands I have a couple of good buddies. They are the type of buddies that everyone should have. They are honest and loyal and hardworking and neither one of them is a Correctional Officer. These guys aren’t just “come over once in a while and barbeque” buddies. These guys are “call them in the middle of the night and they will help you move a body” buddies. I love those guys.

Every so often my buddies and I get together for a night of light drinking and heavy discussion. We talk to each other about our fears and our families, our worries and our wants. We ponder our purpose on this planet, and we share our plans for the future. Our conversations, our connection, help me detox and detach from the world of corrections. Our time together is therapeutic for me, to say the least.

So, one night, while we were sitting around the fire pit in my drive way, one of my buddies pulls out this book entitled “The Other 8 Hours,” by Robert Pagliarini. He showed us the cover, and said that he’d like to read us a couple of pages.

Sure, why not.

The first paragraph he read introduces us to a man named Josh. It talks about how Josh gets up early every morning and eats a healthy breakfast. It talks about how Josh likes to read the newspaper, so he can keep up on current events. The book talks about his exercise habits, and how he likes to spend time with his friends in the evening.

It goes on to say how Josh is learning and growing and staying healthy by eating right and working out five times a week. He reads and he writes and he plays games and he talks to his family at least once a week. Yep, Josh has it all.

Then we meet Eric. Eric is the complete opposite of Josh. Eric gets up in the morning, slams a cup of coffee, and makes a forty-minute commute to work. A thirty-minute lunch break is the only thing that breaks up an otherwise stressful day. The book talks about Eric’s drive home, and how he zones out to the radio trying to decompress from the day’s events. The book talks about how Eric and his wife talk about going to dinner and a movie, but instead they eat McDonald’s and loaf on the couch all night.

It goes on to say that Eric is unhappy and unhealthy, and that he is saddled with a huge amount of debt. It says that Eric can tell you the score of the “big game” but that he has no knowledge of what’s happening in his own community. It ends by saying that Eric wishes he could escape it all.

And then the twist! It turns out that the first guy, the care free, eats healthy, has time for friends and family guy is an inmate. And Eric, with all of his stress and his unhealthy habits and his disappointment is an Officer in the prison that the first guy is incarcerated in.

Mic drop.

So, why do I share this with you?

Well, I guess for the same reason that my buddy shared it with me. He knew that I would relate to Eric, and he knew that I would get the message because he saw that I was Eric. I share it with you because I see Eric in you as well.

See, like Eric we expend a lot of emotional energy on things that don’t really matter, things that we can’t control. Because we work in an environment where we have little to no control over what happens, we seek out things to get worked up about. For example, when I leave for work, when I kiss my wife goodbye, I have no idea when I’m going to be home again. It could be 8 hours, it could be 12 hours, or I could get ordered to stay a second shift in which case it’ll be over 16 hours before I return home. So because I have no control over my own schedule, because that situation is too much to deal with, I pick something small and meaningless to get worked up about, like a memo on a new policy that in reality has nothing to do with me.

Case in point, I remember losing my mind one morning because an Inmate in our behavioral segregation unit threw his breakfast tray at me. I was so worked up that I had to be relieved so I could go get a cup of coffee and calm down. It wasn’t until days later that I understood the absurdity of my reaction to the inmate throwing a tray. See, he’s supposed to throw trays. He’s in the segregation unit, right? That’s what happens in there. He’s not in that particular unit for being a model inmate. Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be upset about having grits all over your pants. I’m just saying that maybe our reaction isn’t always proportionate to the event in question.

Overreacting or underreacting to situations such as this is can be an indicator that we are experiencing stress levels that are outweighing our ability to cope with those stressors. This can spill over into our home life and affect us personally as well as professionally. That’s when we say that we’re “too tired” to go to the party. That’s when we say that we don’t feel like going out tonight. That’s when we stop exercising and doing the things that bring us joy. That’s when we withdraw and isolate ourselves from the real world.

That’s when we give up.

It’d be ironic if the populations we govern, the incarcerated individuals that we supervise, may be living a healthier or more fulfilling life than we are. If all that we do is work and go home and wait to go back to work, aren’t we in the same predicament as the inmates? Aren’t we prisoners? Aren’t we wasting our life?

The trick is to triage all of the things in your life that require you to invest your precious time and emotional energy. Decide what is truly important to you and stop worrying about the rest. Your fatigue, your feeling of being “tired” may be directly related to your emotional overinvestment in things that you can’t control. Spending your “free-time” barricaded in your house sprawled out on the couch may sound appealing, but it is no way to live. You go through hell during your work week! There isn’t a soul out there that deserves to be happy more than you do. But you can’t find fulfillment, you can’t find relief, you can’t find the cure to what ails you from the confines of your sofa.

So get up, get out, and do something, and take Eric with you.

This article as been reprinted with permission from the November 2018 Issue of Correctional Oasis, a monthly e-publication of "Desert Waters Correctional Outreach".

Corporal William Young is a 13-year veteran of the Douglas County Department of Corrections in Omaha, Nebraska. Battling Corrections Fatigue himself, Officer Young is determined to assist his fellow brothers and sisters by helping them identify, manage, and reverse the damaging side effects and symptoms of working in such an environment.

Other articles by Corporal Young


  1. user2810 on 04/14/2020:

    Best Budget Homes is an online platform to get the simplest realty deals for you. At Best Budget Homes, one will find details regarding the property, they're trying to find.

  2. mahe on 03/19/2020:

    good buddies, some bunch of people that feel happy and keep peace in the society. good buddies can be anyone it can be your family member, your friend, batchmate, personally I find my good buddies in saya gold avenue

  3. hamiltonlindley on 03/18/2020:

    Hamilton loves his family of five and badminton. His favorite sports ball team is the McGregor Dodgeballers. He has worked as a foreman on a chain gang, and later in life he was an architect of skyscrapers and tunnels. He was forced to give up his career because he was terrible at math. Hamilton has a keen attention to detail. He enjoyed watching bowling on TV and spent most every weekend on the couch falling asleep. He was a demon at croquet. He also enjoyed war movies and baking shows. Hamilton Lindley is constantly helping others less fortunate and lending a helping hand for relatives and friends in need of encouraging words. He coaches different sports and provided guidance for people who needed it, and a few who didn’t want it.

  4. vishakha singh on 12/27/2019:

    All of the info you have shared with us is amazing for me and I was thinking about this for a long time. Independent Escort in Delhi

  5. vishakha singh on 12/27/2019:

    I was searching for this for a long time and I know you have many different ideas to share with all of us. VIP Delhi Call Girls

  6. vishakha singh on 12/27/2019:

    Usually, it is a good thing to be a part of this wonderful article and I hope for more in future also. Model Call Girls in Delhi

  7. Happy Thanksgiving Pictures on 11/10/2019:

    I would maybe ought to rise as a locality of cluster whereby I doable might have to initiate suggestion from entirely surprising encountered the people WHO speak a substantial live of or less consistent leisure activity. once you your self have any tips, please i want to grasp. a lot of obligated to you. Happy Thanksgiving 2019 Thanksgiving cartoon Images

  8. KimSmith on 10/25/2019:

    The author has given us a wonderful message in her beautiful post that good friends who work for each other cannot be harmful to each other. You need to get best paper writing service to find stunning data for your writing task We need to find good friends who support us in our troubles.

  9. seo123 on 10/05/2019:

    I am so happy I positioned your blog site web site, I positioned you mistakenly, while I was seeing on google for another factor, Anyways I am listed here currently as well as additionally would certainly equal to firmly insist to give thanks to for an incredible post and likewise a well-rounded fulfilling net web site. Please do safeguard the magnum opus. projectsboulevardlimited.shutterfly.com/

  10. Torsten on 09/02/2019:

    I disclose to share the statement right here highlighting you to be able to enable you to acknowledge just simply how much I definitely Liked these details read. I require to screw to a turkey Day Supper nonetheless prepared to leave you a simple statement. We preserved a certain So will certainly wind up being returning being successful credit rating paper to see a significant quantity a lot more of yer lowering side fast analyses. see this site

  11. vti33927 on 07/05/2019:

    The two good buddies, I have honest and loyal buddies, it was a really good feeling and I hope everyone had such type of buddies. I have learned more lessons from https://sitechecker.pro/rank-tracker/ which is sharing about rank tracker. Service is recommended for each website owner or blogger..

  12. Torsten on 06/25/2019:

    I couldn't find any knowledge on this matter prior to. Also, operate a site and if you are ever interested in doing some visitor writing for me if possible feel free to let me know, I'm always looking for people to check out my web site. best hotel and club hyd

  13. joewilson on 04/20/2019:

    Everybody needs buddy. I also have a very good friend who is with me in my every situation. He is like my brother. He is a website designer and a very good person.

  14. Chase73 on 01/01/2019:

    You maybe have a couple of friends, but the one or two that love you more than you. Please be careful about these friends and also love him back.wimbledon tennis escorts

  15. Maryo on 12/29/2018:

    I needed to write you a very small remark so as to give many thanks once again for your spectacular things you’ve contributed here. QuickPayPortal Team Hoping the same high-grade blog post from you in the upcoming as well.

Login to let us know what you think

User Name:   


Forgot password?

correctsource logo

Use of this web site constitutes acceptance of The Corrections Connection User Agreement
The Corrections Connection ©. Copyright 1996 - 2022 © . All Rights Reserved | 15 Mill Wharf Plaza Scituate Mass. 02066 (617) 471 4445 Fax: (617) 608 9015